Beginning Of New Term Gifts

"I don't want to go!"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

Don't you hate...

'Take it easy, the textbooks will be here. It's only August 30.'

"Ah, bless. His first day at school."

"I got the promotion. Instead of Wednesdays, I'm now the one who gets blamed when things go wrong on Tuesdays."

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

Welcome back students.

Starving Philosophy student grappling with the question of the toast in the machine.

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

School Days

"At this school we stress critical thinking. And right now I'm very critical of your thinking."

Milestone in a college student's life: 'Hey! I just got my first collection agency letter, dunning me for my credit card debt!'

"Next, I will make the excitement and enthusiasm of the start of the school year disappear."

'She's taking Chinese and algebra this semester. Go on, Francine, speak a little algebra for them...'

'At every corner I face the same questions: should I go forward? Should I go to the left? Should I go to the right? Where does my fortune lie?'

"Welcome to the team, you'll mainly be working from home and just popping into the office every few weeks for a bit of chitchat and bonhomie."

'You can't take the Ethics course-you're a Political Science major.'

'I don't know why we're starting school so soon. My mom hasn't even reached the end of her rope.'

"A new preacher. He still has that new car smell."

'You are entering second grade, Roger, not first grade the sequel.'

'If we don't learn from history and are doomed to repeat it. . . does that mean that I have to take this class again?'

It's nice to finally find a town big enough for the both of us.

"Don't waste your howl on the moon—emigrate!"

Congratulations on your promotion, Bob, but I should tell you that no one has lasted over a month at the Department of What Could Possibly Go Wrong.

"It's not what you know, it's who you know." "Either way, I'm starting from scratch."

'We're broke and tired, but the kids are finally off to school.'

The first day of school is always filled with crazy emotions. Joy and trauma. Triumph and failure. Frustration and disappointment. And that's just dealing with my cruddy new locker.

'I thought we retired last May.'

'I hate the first day of school.'