Bedroom Disaster Artist Pillows

'This is my natural habitat.'

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

"You overwatered the plant, again."

Tedious Romantic.

Rats deserting a sinking ship

"Hello?"

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Oh, hi!... yes, we have another emergency... make it the usual, and you know the address!'

"I've fixed the shelf, darling."

"Wow! You've made a lovely job of those shelves in the hallway Gary!"

"... 'Do it yourself enthusiast'?... No, George is more of a, 'cock it up yourself enthusiast'!"

'I'd like to come over, but Mom cleaned my room and it's going to take me all day to put it right again.'

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

Builders build a property that has a crease in it like the design plan.

My boat

"Can you weaken the spring or something? -- It keeps knocking my coffee over."

A botched home improvement job.

'Is it still edible?'

"I hope you like smoked salmon."

'He may be a brilliant academician, but he's even dumber than the rest of us when he tries to do anything practical around the house.'

"The fire department ruined dinner."

"I know I said I was hungry, but I'm not that hungry."

Harry believed in having the right tool for the wrong job.

"It's just a hunch, but you may have the power set too high on your pressure washer."

"After working from home for ten months, I quit my job to spend less time with my family."

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

'I've gotta go to the john. Have you seen my travel mug?'

"Well it's either my dinner or my shirt."