Bedroom Chats Gifts

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

"Stand up, honey. The president's on. You're committing treason."

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

Performance In The Bedroom

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

'It's called a bedSIDE manner, Doctor.'

The Sex life of a Driving Test Examiner, "Thank you. I will not ask you to perform that manoeuvre again."

"Well done Carson! This could be the answer to our bed shortage problems!"

'We know it makes you happy, but your father and I think you're spending too much time on the computer.'

'Tell the doctor that I'm too sick to see him.'

S&M Lovers, "Not tonight dear... I haven't got a headache."

"Is there room for me?"

"Are we there yet?"

"And just like that, Greg's snoring stopped..."

Dali Paints His Dreams

"Honey are you asleep?" "I am now."

'I guess you two won't be reading the Kama Sutra again.'

Colin's GPS was to prove useless at finding Maureen's 'G' spot.

"Next time, Id' like the director's cut."

'I'm not applauding your lovemaking, I'm trying to turn off the lights.'

"It was meant as a compliment. In my eyes, you're a real pig."

Selfish man stealing the duvet.

'Paradise awaits pauline Norris' man in bed with a mask on

New Karma Sutra: No.1 The Begging Position.

"Bloody hell Mavis, the earth DID move!"

"Wake up Jeff. You're snoring again!"

'I think it's time we got rid of the espresso maker.'

I can't believe you're still hogging the sheets.

"I enjoy role-playing, but do we really need the dramaturge?"

"Two minute warning..."

'I'm going to Internets Anonymous...we meet in a Yahoo chatroom!'