Becoming Famous Pillows

'Our son might be 'Lord Greystoke' and all now, but he still writes to us when he needs advice...'

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

Do you have to write the 5 paragraph essays to be a rich investment banker? Or rock star? Or famous actress? No. No. And no. Then why learn to write one? So when those jobs don't work out

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

"This number goes out to all the little people I met on my way back down."

"She's all over YouTube."

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

'I'm a star!'

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

"My first video sucked. But I figure I've got 8 more chances."

Directors chairs on movie set with Model, Actress, and Whatever on them

"In the future, son, everyone will be an attorney for fifteen minutes."

As Seen On TV

'Something that'll get me googled,'

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

'I was 'Sweatin' To The Oldies', and I flipped over on my back!'

'Come in, Jordan - your time is up.'

'I was only famous for 14 and a half minutes.'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'

Media Whore Raceway.

"I'm all over the Internet, so why hide? I might as well come out and enjoy myself."

'Any backup plan in case your dream of becoming a YouTube sensation doesn't pan out?'

Chewbacca mom and her entire family get full college scholarships.

"The baby is one thing - but how does the plant get more likes than me?"

"I think I've already had my fifteen minutes of fortune."

"A movie deal, a recording contract, clothing line, rehab, first marriage, fragrance, baby, second marriage, reality show …"

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

"Ever since my fame, everyone's been coming out of the woodwork claiming to be a relative."

Virgil van Dijk

"I know I'm good looking, but am I good looking enough to move to California?"

"Say something viral."

Due to greater bandwidth and higher download speeds, your 15 minutes of fame will be reduced to 7 seconds of celebrity.

Johnny Cashpoint.

'Someday, you'll be a big star!'