Beaver Biology Buff T-Shirts

"OK Dad, I've counted and categorised all the trees in our part of the wood: Now we can start on our sustainability plan..."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

At the Museum

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Apples for sale

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

'Some of those youngsters have come up with a terrific new idea - feathers.'

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'I don't see why I have to pick it up. I'm not responsible for the law of gravity.'

"Technically, it's a mammal."

Archimedes, Galileo, Copernicus

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

The Age of Reptiles. . .

You must be this tall.

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

"What's a nine-letter word for biotechnology?"

Genius Envy

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"That concludes my presentation on popular music and alternative energy."