Bear Tracker Gifts

'Bear tracks... and they're fresh!'

"Trust me, Lew, if anyone knows where the salmon are jumping, she does!"

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

'Those bears are so cute I wish we could have brought them home.'

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"... and what’s even worse – I spilled my beer!"

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

"Yes, it's nice my husband has hoarded a fortune, but it would be nicer if he would let me spend some of it though..."

'I demand a DNA test.'

'Did you just hear that? We are now and endangered species and mating is now our top priority!'

"It's called, 'Goth'."

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'No, I'm not being tracked by scientists, just by my wife...'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

'Uh-oh... when mom calls me by my full latin species name, I'm in big trouble.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

"Tracks of black bear cub... Tracks of black bear mother... Tracks of Henry David Thoreau."

"You inviting me to lunch? I don't know - after all - I barely know you!"

'Aw,hunting season is a cleansing time. A time to forget about my worries...'

'This is not fair, mom. . . none of my friends is forced to hibernate before December.'

Baby Bear.

"Let me know when you get tired of berries. We'll work on your people skills."

'I think we have some stowaways.'

"Trash pickup isn't for another two days, isn't it?"

I can hear growling, but I can't see the bear.

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

Somehow, Bigfoot's cousin 'Bighands' always escaped detection

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

"Today on Wall Street, yesterday's panic selling was replaced by panic buying."

"Who's on duty today...you or me?"