Beachside Bard Gifts

John takes a personivacation.

Lady of the bath...

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

"And this little piggy went – whoa! Where is your fifth little piggy?!"

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

Lemonade fruit juice water stand and Umbrellas, sump, pumps, raincoats stand.

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

"You'd like a book by Shakespeare? Certainly sir - which one. . .?"

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"Renovating your bathroom?"

Desert Island Books

"I think that I shall never see a tree on which I wouldn't pee."

"I'll have the chicken or the eggs benedict—whichever of them comes first."

Knight of the sandcastle.

'Don't they look silly?'

"Are there sharks in the water?"

'Nostradamus enjoyed singing in the tub'

'...when all at once I saw a bunch, a bunch of golden daffodils...no, it still doesn't sound right.'

"All you cockroaches, …. When he tries to listen to the ocean, … run as fast as you can into his ear."

'She's always got to go one better.' (Two catty ladies knitting, talking about the other lady at a loom).

'A working vacation, your honor?'

'I wanted a burial service, he wanted cremation, so I decided to compromise and have him clambaked.'

Bet and Breakfast.

Lighting the Lighthouse

'If it's not bothering you, I wouldn't bother having it removed.'

"Have you heard about what the fiberglass in surfboards can do to you?"

"Another win for your boring stories."

'Can't you forget you're a property developer for once?'

'Hey! Can she tell a story or what?'