Beachgoer With A Sense Of Humor Gifts

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

'Hang in there, buddy! I know CPR!'

And today's winner of a special place in Hell is...Guys who wear bikini style bathing suits to the beach...

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

"Ah...summer...and umbrellas as far as you can see...it reminds me of England!"

"I'm sorry, sir, but Dostoyevsky is not considered summer reading. I'll have to ask you to come with me."

Mankini - One size fits all.

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Who are you trying to fool, that's a beach towel.'

'I'm afraid your conditions shows no improvement over last time, Mr. Ferguson -- you must still be doing enjoyable things.'

'Let's follow this guy you said, he seems to know the way!'

'I think your pot has roasted.'

Try and ride Brexit the donkey

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

Shrink's Summer Job

'I thought you said inflatables were allowed on the beach.'

"Don't pull the draw string too tight - you'll choke yourself out."

"I said, you have to be active in your own rescue!"

A beach has meters.

Why do men wear long short pants?

'I am wearing my bikini!'

I suppose you're wondering why I summoned you, minion. Not really, boss. I've noticed a disturbing trend: Bikinis are getting smaller and smaller. So small, in fact, that they no longer hid anything. I think it's about time our caf

Tsunami Selfie

'Is this the way to the beach?'

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water.

'A working vacation, your honor?'

Sure, she could talk the talk, but couldn't walk the walk, shock the jock, lock the dock or even hawk a little sunblock.

'She's always got to go one better.' (Two catty ladies knitting, talking about the other lady at a loom).

The New Summer.

Dead mermaid

'Erica, you're a cutie and I really like you, but your way to do French kissing makes me nervous!'

Sunblock 2025

'Last week he gave me artificial recreation.'