Bathroom Bill Commentator Gifts

Buck Newton

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

"This stool shall pass."

"How do you say ‘Where is the bathroom’ in Sanskrit?"

'I know it's a bit unusual, but that's where he gets all the best ideas.'

'Mongrel' 'Bitch's' - His and Hers towels for Dogs.

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

The only Washroom on the South Pole.

Business man sees himself as a shark

'So how do you manage such a close shave?' 'Simple,i wait till the very last second.'

His & hers towels.

"I've been having stomach problems. I sit on the bathroom for 30 minutes in the morning...and a half-hour in the evening."

"Hydro density appartus invention? Go away - I'm not disturbing his bath for that!"

Don't Waste A Moment! Put Down That Magazine And Get Fit While You Sit!

'Wow, look at all these prescription drugs that are out of date.' FLUSH 'Happy as clams explained.'

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

"Hurry up Dad, I need the loo!"

Batman tissue dispenser.

"Recycled, Wayne, we'd prefer 'recycled'."

Monkey Pee/Monkey Poo.

'I take a cold shower every morning... right after my daughters have taken hot ones.'

Soap recovery Ship in bath

"Yeah, hello travel agent, Danger Noodle needth getaway."

Vanity artist

The Rural Bidet...

I've got a new theory, Randy, and it's going to shock the world. Why? Because it's pretty much irrefutable. You know how when you're in the bathroom, it feels like five minutes have passed … but to those waiting to use it, it feels like forever? Yes … And you know how when you're at the event horizon of a black hole, five minutes to you actually is forever to the rest of the universe? ... I think we'd better alert Neil Degrasse Tyson. I call it the Time Toilation Theory.

'Feeeeeeeeed me, Seymooooooooor.'

"When it takes longer to wash your face, you're getting bald."

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

Duck in a bathtub

'It's been a rough day, my shirt button fell off, the handle of my brief case came off... I'm too scared to go to the bathroom!'

Crossword bathroom tiles.

'Honey, I need the Drano again!'

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.