Baseball Nostalgia Fan Gifts

'Remember when pitchers would walk on their own to and from the mound?'

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

350 Feet.

Perils of the double play.

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

"My wife wanted to see a diamond. So I took her to a ballgame."

Bases loaded, no outs. And coach once again turns to his trusty golden reliever.

'I shoulda told you guys. . . Marmaduke makes up his own rules as we go along.'

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

Sheltering in place.

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

'OK, now let's switch places.'

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

"Oh, how I wish the season would start!"

Monster Baseball

"Slugger goes yard!!!"

"Got him up at the stadium, Chief. It was Yankee Duck Day."

Official Team Cap With Beard

I can just feel it. I know they're talking about me.

Goodbye Opiate of the Masses

Extra innings.

'Here is is. 'Vicarious: imagined participation in another's experience' ... it doesn't mean you actually get to play on your son's team.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

"We would have won if it hadn't been for the other team."

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

Baseball Dreams

"Get the meat loaf—I hit it out of the park today."

'It took some doing, but we got your name on!'

'Dad says I can't come out tonight. It's some sort of infield fly rule.'