Barrister Banter Lover Pillows

'First time I've seen a law degree with an expiration date.'

"Ello, ello..& ello

"The only thing trivial about pursuing this trivial lawsuit is my fee!"

Trial by Media

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'

I love Lawyers

Barristers

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"Oh dear, it's just as we suspected.. they do come from another planet."

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

"Bailiff."

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

Law School teacher.

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'I like you, you've got balls.'

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'