Barrel Champions Gifts

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

Opening the Barrel

A giant glass of red wine

An angry barbecue.

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

'Somebody's got to be kidding,'

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"We could have saved time and just served the served the charcoal briquettes."

'It was still pitch black when I left for work: I picked my son's toy barrel instead of mine...'

'The ban of stimulants, includes St Bernards. The brandy keg will have to go.'

'Dad, the wine's been put into used barrels, just like you ordered. I got a great deal on them from Exxon.'

One more please.

'Milking' the Wine Barrel.

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

'You bunch of gatherers call that hunting? Get back out there and this time try the pointy end first!'

"That wasn't very nurturing of you."

"It's disappointing, but if that's the biggest you've got ..."

"No, it's not some new wearable tech."

A man polishes a giant wine bottle.

"It's 'Toad in the charcoal'."

Premier Cru

"Terrible, I couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried."

Diogenes and the Greek Crisis

'And what makes you think you're good enough for the darts team?'

"Not sure if it's French oak, but I'm positive our wine is barrel aged."

'It's very 'woody'...'

Root Beer. We'll take a keg, but you'll have to hold the check for a while. The first root beer float.

"Congratulations on winning the milking contest."

"For heaven's sake woman having a few drinks is an important part of the job"

"When did you realize you were naked?"

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

Jumping the barrel.

"Gin? Oh God, I hate gin."

If my recent vintage ages well, I'll be part of a very small group saying "2020 was a very good year."