Barber Shop Frequenter Gifts

"Can I help you?"

Hair Crop Circle

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

"...and yes, you did take too much off the top!"

"I'm thinkin' blond."

Deer Barber

"Well sir. . . you could have a crew cut, flat top, a stiff quiff, a hi-top fade. . . "

"Not too much off my back."

'Sorry ... I'm having a 'bad hair' day.'

Down at the Local Baa-Baa Shop

The crew of the pirate ship 'The Bearded Lady' celebrate their greatest booty haul ever.

'There...now you'll fit in with the other plucked turkeys, er, footballers.'

"Wow - a piranha fish!! What do you feed it on...?"

A Feud between Al and Tony leaves Mr. Coyle with a prosthetic ear.

"I'll be glad when I get rid of this handover!"

'You wouldn't be so quiet either if you had to sit on this board!'

Have a drink with me tonight. I can't I'm married. Tell your husband you're working. Tell him yourself, he's shaving you.

Boris Johnson.

"Could you trim the sides but leave it feathered on top?"

"You're doing too much, Mort." "I don't know what you mean." "Optimum scruffiness is a delicate balance. One cannot have both wild hair and a wild mustache. It must be one or the other." "What about Einstein? He was behaired all over the place." "The only exceptions are for hobos, bikers and the big-brained." "I rode my Huffy here, does that count?"

Man looking in mirror at the barber's.

"Not too much off the top, Floyd!"

Jack-o-lantern in a Barbershop

'I won't be howling at the moon tonight. I've joined a barbershop quartet.'

Man Falls Asleep At The Hairdressers.

"Is that enough off the top?"

Deer having his antlers removed at the barbers

Man with stubble that reads: 'Shave me.'

'Okay - let's forget the budget treatment'

"Fred, I never discuss politics with a man who has a weapon in his hands."

Vlad the Barber.

"The ear? I married a rancher's daughter."

"Does sir wear his hair cut just off the ear?"

"I'd like a haircut - the one on the right!"

All the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxis and cutting hair!