"He's always had a fascination with the hard drinking,hard living writer,the tortured genius. It's an image he's tried to emulate. Unfortunately he's only ever managed the first two parts." "I can't <hic> feel my face."
Bar Fly Humorist Pillows
Add a humorous touch to their relaxing space with our playful pillows. Designed for the bar fly humorist, these cushions bring comfort and comedy together.
"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."
"I just realized you're my entire entourage."
'Your husband? He's just leaving...'
"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."
'I met my wife in unfortunate circumstances. I was single.'
"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"
'I'm not drinking with you anymore after what you did to me this morning. . .'
'Wine, high octane grape juice.'
"What other tricks does he need?"
Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you
"I had a low birth weight but a high birthright."
Complementary Beverages
"Gimme a lite. Bug Lite."
'George said he was coming here to unwind.'
"Oh isn't that your squeeze slithering this way?"
Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes
"Do you take dark money?"
"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"
Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.
"That's right, Carl. I'm bitchy. I'm supposed to be bitchy."
"Drinking improves my vodkabulary."
"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."
"Ooops - I'm afraid that was my beer...wait a second whilst I consult my swearword consultant."
It was the bottom of the fifth and the bases were loaded.
Mary Margaret, the best bar nun.
'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'
"...and when the show's not on the road, we still like to work together."
Do you mind if I mix a little business with pleasure and have a brief conversation with the waiter about the fly in my soup?
'Of all the fern bars in Encino, she's gotta walk into mine.'
Mo's USA Bar: Tips/Tariffs
"Welcome to Trapeze Talent Inc. If you'd like us to catch you, fill out this form, and we'll get back to you if we're interested."
"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."
"So. Are you a mime, a puppeteer, or a ventriloquist?"
Joe's Tavern: Perfect Attendance
Bar Fly Humorist Pillows Collection
Bar Fly Humorist Mugs
Explore our collection of mugs designed for the bar fly humorist—perfect for adding a touch of wit to their morning routine.
Bar Fly Humorist Prints
Discover our witty prints for the bar fly humorist—bring humor and personality to any room with these eye-catching designs.
Bar Fly Humorist T-Shirts
Check out our humorous t-shirts made for the bar fly humorist—great for making a statement and sharing a laugh.