Bar Fly Buddy T-Shirts

Thinkers Drinker.

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

Dolphin friendly tuna

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'I'm not drinking with you anymore after what you did to me this morning. . .'

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you

"I had a low birth weight but a high birthright."

'George said he was coming here to unwind.'

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"Oh isn't that your squeeze slithering this way?"

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

"Do you take dark money?"

"Another Martoonie?"

"Ooops - I'm afraid that was my beer...wait a second whilst I consult my swearword consultant."

Happy Hour 5-7. (Not really an hour, not really happy.) At last, truth in advertising.

"That's right, Carl. I'm bitchy. I'm supposed to be bitchy."

Mary Margaret, the best bar nun.

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

It was the bottom of the fifth and the bases were loaded.

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'

'That guy is SO tacky.'

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

'Just as I suspected, guys - looks like we'be got ourselves an undercover wine drinker.'

"Do you know what girls want?"

'I'd feel better spending all my money here if you were a registered charity.'

"Is that neat whisky?"

"...and when the show's not on the road, we still like to work together."

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

Virtual Babe

"I don't know—my gut tells me I should have another beer."

Joe's Tavern: Perfect Attendance