Bar Aficionado Gifts

'Bourbon, rocks.'

Directions to the Bar.

Dogs at bar: 'If it weren't for teh food and shelter, I'd never chase another frisbee.'

"Can a rising tide list a boat that has a huge hole in the bottom?"

Victorian woman at a bar.

"I have a tattoo on the back of my neck, since I can't see it, I've forgotten what it is."

Joe's Bar.

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

"Yes, your bill is $309. $9 for the drink, and $300 for the counseling."

Roughly translated it says' Happy Hour.'

Crow Bar

"Thank god our drinks are protected."

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

"Beneath my clothing, I'm completely nude. And the best part is, it's completely legal!"

"I think if there's one thing we've all learned from this, it's that we haven't learned a damn thing."

"Keep 'em coming until I smile."

"Here's one. Swatter or flypaper?"

"All drinks are half-priced during happy hour. . . but only if you can prove you're happy."

A beer pump labelled 'Testosterone'

"You're talking politics? Take it outside or online, but not here!"

"Yes, that guy sitting next to me vanished into thin air. Instead of an ad-blocker, I have a jerk-blocker."

"Gimme a fly shot...and make it a double."

'You're in Gallery Two... right, see you in the bar.'

Fred's Bar: Dealing with Anger in Positive ways.

'Don't you remember These are bar stools where we first met.'

'And until you DO care who wins the big game, STAY OUT!'

Info Superhiway Bar & Grill...Happy hour, 5 - 5:05.

'You've had enough, Mac, go home to the busom of your family.'

'I just found a refugee in my Cuba Libre!'

Homicidal maniac.

'This is a POLITICS bar, gentlemen - I'll have to ask you not to discuss RELIGION.'

Howdy Ed.. howja like the new saloon?

'Yeah, it's strange, all right. Ordinarilly they're the home-loving type.'

'You must spend you whole life in here.' - 'No, sometimes I go down to the Crown.'

'A ventriloquist, eh? -- What do ventriloquists believe in?'