Bank Security Personnel Gifts

Money in mousetrap

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Mario Draghi

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

The Shrinking Dollar.

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

'You know, you can do this all online now.'

"The club scene is really changing."

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

Private Viewing

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

"The security scanner said I have exquisite feet."

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

'This is okay, but my ambition is to be an automatic teller.'

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

Bluewater security man stopping baby with hood.