Bank Robbery Parody Pillows

'. . . before we rob the bank, let's synchronise our pacemakers!

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'

A man notices the Chase logo has turned into snakes eating themselves."

"I want to report a race crime.'

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

"Keep it running."

"Sorry, but we're only accepting deposits at this time."

'With every 'Ying' there's a 'Yang'!'

Bank (with saloon type doors)

Full Service ATM: "Do you want fries with that?"

"If a higher interest rate is a sign of a stronger economy, you must think I'm golden."

"Collateral? How about I teach you what ties to avoid?"

"Once upon a time there was a kind old bank that did not charge its customers a fee."

'Jake, honey, if you need some cash, my purse is in the kitchen. You already robbed a bank today.'

'Well £60 million is LESS than I'm used to...but now that we've agreed my bonus, what working capital will the Bank have?'

I'm thinking of taking the next step and becoming a snail...what mortgages have you got to offer?

"Hold everything, Louis!"

Bank Checking and Savings. It's a new policy, sir --- There's a substantial penalty for any kind of withdrawal.

'It's true their security is better here but they don't have overdraft fees.'

"If our bank had a negative interest rate we would be rich."

'Got the money?'

'They bounce it off a satellite.'

"Once we're in, Frank will get he TV remote, Eddie will grab the phone charger, and Ace - you'll be on tupperware lids."

Handy Guide to Masking...

"Try to be patient, sir. Give your stick-up text a few seconds to upload."

'This is a money order.'

'Too late. The government beat you to it.'

'Now you've signed all your assets over to the bank, I'm happy to lend you your bus fare home.'

"This charge is for your monthly service fee and this charge is because you didn't have it."

"Our checks bounced again."

'Hey, Mr. Jones. I'd know that voice anywhere!'

Ask About Our Attractive Deposit Rates

"Yes, we do make car loans, but you CAN'T borrow my car."

Small Loan Dept.

"Collateral?... Oh, trust me. When you see the collateral I've brought with me, you'll be running to your safe."