Ball Control Strategist Gifts

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'Let's go over our secret play.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"Look, I know the other team is taller than we are...but I'm pretty sure this isn't allowed."

'This is not what I meant by a free kick.'

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

Football fans discuss a deceased manager: A giant, a legend, much loved. Didn't we sack him?

'Since the playing field was sold off we've become a centre of excellence for one-a-side football.'

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

"Uniformly accelerated motion"

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'