Balance Ponderer Gifts

A Chinese person pushes a yin and yang symbol up a hill.

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

'Euro's down against the pound, dollars up against yen, pound is... what the hell don't expect cheap meals in France!'

The Apple Picker Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree....

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

'You have to admire the way Hartley overcame his honesty and integrity to get to the top.'

'We could use more moving and shaking from you, Yomp, and less bobbing and weaving.'

'My research cover two fields: the behavior of matter under high pressure, and the behavior of scientists under high pressure.'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'How would you like your steak, sir?' - 'Big.'

Sitting down

"Hello! - Have you ever thought about changing your energy supplier..?"

Fruits and vegetables

Physicists at the Fourth Grotschlov Conference assembled to determine once and for all if light is a wave or a particle.

'I'm dubious. Neutrinos may be bigger than we thought, but they're not that big.'

Nigel finds the Higgs boson.

"But if you've given up on a fifth force, how can you possibly discover a sixth force?"

Physicist Frank Bartholomew gets a big, BIG break in his search for the ever-elusive neutrino.

'Waiting for...'

'Quarks, neturinos, mesons. All those damn particles you can't see. That's what drove me to drink. But now i can see them!'

Man confusing man using statistics.

"If this is correct, then everything we thought was a wave is really a particle, and everything we thought was a particle is really a wave."

'And remember - happiness can't buy you money.'

'Oh, thunderation! Now everyone will want one and every little, rinky dink nation on earth will claim the inalienable right to own one. And the Chinese will pirate it and flood the market . . .'

"Speed is its defining quality - hence the name 'Large' Hadron Collider."

After years of experimentation, scientists remain dubious about whether there really is such a thing as the Cute Particle.