Bag Buster Gifts

'Let's give him a couple more minutes, but it looks like we've got ourselves a bum who can't fight his way out of a paper bag.'

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"Love the bag, Stell! Very career."

"That's an everblue."

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

"This is crazy! We've been here only 10 minutes, we've spent all our money, and we've got nothing to show for it!"

'We're cutting back on our legal expenses and going with the violence instead.'

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

"Be patient. It's almost dead."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

'My firm has scrutinised your budget and determined you could save a fortune by sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!'

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

"Well, you know what they say —'The water's always bluer on the other side of the trash fence.'"

Horror Theater. Now Playing. Return of the Deficit.

Utility Chic.

Oil shock.

Yes, dear, I remembered the coupons and saved a few dollars. The Adventures of Marriedman.

Flies up the ante!

"I don't mind out of control spending as long as it's on stuff I like."

'His debugging skills are exceptional.'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

'Please excuse the mess - we've been busy throwing good money after bad!'

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

Celebrity endorsements? I thought you said celibate endorsements. No wonder we're coming in under budget.

Put it in petty cash.