Bad Book Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Personally, there's nothing I like better than to curl up in bed with a bad woman."

Thomas Mann.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Victor Hugo

Reading my Critics

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Television Readers.

Silence of the Chickens...

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

Characters jumping out of a book.

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Iris Murdoch

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."

"International best seller! It's just a squirrel."

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

'Meet the author with her collaborators'

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

My Literary Influences

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

'It'll never work. I'm reading 'Of Mice And men' and you haven't even gotten through 'If You Give A Mouse A Cookie,.'

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

Tolstoy and Dostoevsky plan a collaboration - 'War and Punishment'... it'll make us a bundle.

'According to this, you owe $57.32 in late fees for the book 'Getting By on a Shoestring Budget'.'

Editor.