Backyard Birder Gifts

No Diving.

'Since I'm an ornithologist, this means we can deduct the electric bill.'

Squirrel Tapping On Window Demanding Food.

'We should probably start buying smaller nuts'

Bird at birdbath shaving.

(Talking to birds) 'Don't blame me. I didn't mix the stuff!'

'George! Come and look at your squirrel-proof feeder!'

Bird table canteen.

'I love these bed and breakfast places.'

"It's a bird feeder to attract birds of prey."

'How do they know it's breakfast time? It's your garden clock, birdbrain!'

"Yeah, it's a nice birdbath...but sometimes I prefer a shower."

"A bowl of your finest seed. And another table."

"Whatever you do, don't make eye contact."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

"This never happened."

'The problem with migrating is that the roaming charges for my mobile phone are enormous...'

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

'The birdseed's okay. But I just like driving 'em crazy.'

'I told you that rock wall climbing would be useful. I'll get our ball back with no trouble at all.'

"These songbirds every morning at five A.M. would be really annoying if they weren't so damn talented."

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

"The pH level seems a little off."

baby birds in a nest reading Chick Lit

Stories about crumbs

I know they told me not to bark

'Times sure have changed. When I was your age, I made them from scratch.'

Leaves drop from trees and bounce off a trampoline.

The Tardis Shed

'He's in charge of out 'Lost-and-Buried' department.'

"I see Mom won't let you go to the lake again."

"She said they were going out back to look for dinosaurs."