Baby Myth Enthusiast Pillows

'Sign here.'

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Whoa

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

Baby has used blocks to spell out 'SO VERY BORED'.

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

Maternity Ward

'How many fingers do you see?'

'Listen! It kicked again right here. I swear it's not appendicitis!'

Uterus: One size fits all.

Bouncing baby

'You're up the duff with a bun in the oven.'

Giving Birth

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

Maternity Hospital

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

'Well, he certainly has his Father's vocabulary.'

Newborn making the V-sign

"She's pretty smart. She already knows enough to spit out vegetables."

"It's from HQ, they're replacing me with a younger man!"