Baby Development Pillows

"Wouldn't a teething ring be better than a house-brick?"

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"They grow up so fast."

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

My First Camera

Baby Piano

"He likes it."

Pool attached to child's bed.

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

"She's been so creative lately."

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'The child is very illogical'

"That's not how I sat on you."

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"No, I don’t find it funny that her first words are ‘South Park’!"

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

'He has your nose and my ears.'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"