Awkward Social Experimenter Pillows

"It's over." "I'm outta here." "It's not you, it's me."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

What price beauty?

"One day mommy's slime molds will all be yours!"

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

'...the side effects of this designer drug are more beneficial than it's intended use!'

"I feel so seen right now."

"Well, here's the problem. Someone changed the greeting control from 'curt nod' to 'hug.'"

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

'I should warn you, I charge double if you want me to examine both of them, Mrs. Jacobs.'

'Oh, wow, you found my science project and it works!'

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

Under strict laboratory conditions extensive research proves that, despite being watched, pots do eventually boil.

'If that's the way he feels about chemistry, there's no harm done.'

Thank you for not asking how my experiment is coming along.

Gracie invents a smart spray from her science kit.

Scientist with test tube.

Hugs and knucklebumps don't mix.

'I'm not sure I want to see you again, but just in case, I've backed you up on a flash drive.'

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"The hardest part was teaching him to use the hedge trimmers."

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

'Would you like to come over to my place and see a video of my first marriage?'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"Try to play with a kid whose parent isn't too chatty."

'You say Merezenski did the exact same experiment, but did Merezenski add chocolate syrup at this point?'

"Me: I never get invited to anything Also me: Sorry, I'm so tired, think I'll stay in."

'I've never felt like this on a first date, Tom, you're suffocating me.'