
'Pleased to meet you.'
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'Pleased to meet you.'
The invisibility of the invisible man always ended in the most unfortunate places.
'Boy...it can be awkward meeting the parents for the first time.'
A man has died while having a shower and has turned up in Heaven naked and not amused.
"Don't panic Maud - I've made the vicar a cup of tea."
'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'
"Siri, search 'How to get out of a catastrophically bad first day'."
Showbiz Awards
'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'
"Something romantic, perhaps?"
'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'
"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."
When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?
Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...
You're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you, even though there's a fly in my soup doing the backstroke, which is comedy gold!
'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'
"You and your daft inventions."
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?
"I suppose I should have let a few minutes elapse between declaring my love for you and announcing that I also loved lobster."
'Show one more kitten photo,lady and the next time you see me will be on a 'missing' poster!'
Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.
"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"
"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."
"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."
"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."
"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."
"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."
Speed Dating Disasters
"I'm sensing an awkward presence."
"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."
"Don't make eye-contact, don't make eye-contact..."
"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"
'Look. . . for the last time, I'm not playin' 'footsie' with you!'
"Say these things, don't think them!"
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