
Colin had read that women liked men who asked them questions about themselves
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Colin had read that women liked men who asked them questions about themselves
"Quick interruption to assure you I'm listening and not just rehearsing a response over and over in my head."
Injection Window
Showbiz Awards
'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'
"Something romantic, perhaps?"
'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'
'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'
"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."
Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...
You're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you, even though there's a fly in my soup doing the backstroke, which is comedy gold!
When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'
Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?
"You and your daft inventions."
"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."
Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.
"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."
"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."
'Show one more kitten photo,lady and the next time you see me will be on a 'missing' poster!'
"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"
"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."
"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."
"Are you blushing?!"
"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."
Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.
"Don't make eye-contact, don't make eye-contact..."
'Look. . . for the last time, I'm not playin' 'footsie' with you!'
"I'm sensing an awkward presence."
Speed Dating Disasters
'By the way Adrian, it unfastens at the front.'
"Say these things, don't think them!"
"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"
"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"
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