Awkward Conversation Aficionado Pillows

'Sorry, I thought I was muttering behind someone elses back.'

"Don’t think of this as a breakup ... think of it as me dating your best friend."

"Well, son, it seems you've inherited my deplorable taste in pornography."

'I guess I'll let you go...' 'Don't you mean you're done talking and you'll hang up on me if I don't go?' 'Well, yeah.'

Very Difficult Conversations

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

What price beauty?

"Ya know, boys and girls studying alone like this is strictly forbidden in Iran."

'Miss Kress, who on our staff is in charge of denials and uncomfortable realities.'

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

"My previous patient thought he was a cruise missile."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Tell me about yourself... what you do, where you live, the last four digits of your social security number..."

'Hi, I'm Raoul...I shall be your talking point of the evening.'

Friendly Fire: 'Good to see you, Geoff. . . wife and kids ok? How's the garden looking this summer? You're sacked!'

'Hello! I don't believe I've bored you yet...'

'Bill, I'm sorry to hear about your going into the hospital. Is it a MALE problem?'

A man and a woman at a house party

The Man Who Couldn't Say "When."

Send. End.

"Does this mean I have to talk to someone I don't know?"

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but actually 47% of 235 people covering 34%..."

"I'm not used to communicating face-to-face. Can we conduct this interview via text?"

'It's not you it's me not liking you.'

A shy parish cleric seeking to talk business with a lady

"What a lovely little dog. What's his name?"

'How can you possibly be busy washing your hair for the rest of your life???'

"I'm good thanks."

"I'm the eldest of three, yet I'm a highly social, under-achieving risk taker. Try and explain that!"

"Have you talked to Baldo about girls lately?"

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

"What I like best about you is how you, er ...the way you, ummm....You know, there's actually nothing I like about you."

"Rudy, I went out on a date last night. It was a miserable failure." "Sorry." "As my employee, you've seen me day in and day out. You know me better than anyone." "Rudy, do I, your boss and sole source of income, have some personality flaw?" "Or did the fault lie entirely with my date?" "Feel free to speak candidly." "Mother."

"And I'm actually the one who puts the giblets back into the chickens..."

"When you people start working eggs into the conversation, it's really code for something else,right?"