Awkward Complimentor Pillows

"I'll take this book. A buddy recommended it to me. . . no idea why. Holy crap! You're one helluva hot chick!!"

What price beauty?

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

'Here goes the second bottle of champagne... I think it would be fair of You to tell me what are my chances so I know whether to order another bottle or not...'

'I'm not sure I want to see you again, but just in case, I've backed you up on a flash drive.'

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

"Ask me anything you want about Water Cress!"

"To be honest I'd rather make love not war, but my chat-up lines are terrible."

'As long as I stand here I'm safe. . . no stress. . . no pressure. . . no need to impress. . . I can just relax and be who I am. . .'

Nethead strip: Dates

"It's not you, Glen—it's your ex-wife. She's behind me, isn't she?"

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

'Find out if she would have like me if I hadn't asked so many people.'

Dr Atkins on a date: 'Why does he keep looking at me like I'm a piece of meat?'

What a pear?

'...and bring a friend. If you have one...'

"Hey, not bad! You sound like a real couple already!"

Send. End.

Man spilling coffee and papers, looking like an awkward dance

"Statistically speaking, there's got to be at least one woman in there who's looking for the awkward sensitive type."

"Does this mean I have to talk to someone I don't know?"

"I'm not used to communicating face-to-face. Can we conduct this interview via text?"

'It's not you it's me not liking you.'

'OK, I'll admit it. You're a genius at parallel parking.'

'I never know what to do with my hooves at a party.'

A shy parish cleric seeking to talk business with a lady

Geek Todd Jones strikes out with his 3000th wiman to take over third place on the all time geek strikeout list.

Do I REALLY look like George Clooney... Now THAT'S what I call selling.

"You know, Estella's pretty cool."

'How can you possibly be busy washing your hair for the rest of your life???'

Things you don't want to hear on a blind date.

Inexplicably Sharon was not interested in a second date.