Award Collectors Gifts

If Ben Franklin had been granted his wish for our national symbol.

"And here is the winning board of the year."

"Ed has his own trophy manufacturing business."

'... and I got this one for being a dishwasher.'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"Ironically, this is the living room."

'Teenagers!'

The Victors

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

The one that got away

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

Award Winning Gardener

"... and what’s even worse – I spilled my beer!"

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

Dad Trophies

Win - win

"Do you buy cars here?"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"Wait, you're firing me?! But I was Time magazine’s Person of the Year!"

Cat Show

'Guess what? I won again.'

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

Pinata Trophies

"Caricatures $20"

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

'God's speed.'

First Prize!

'What makes you think I want a trophy wife?'

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

'I finished last, but I was the only one who passed the drug test.'