Award Chasers T-Shirts

This is the dance of how to get your bronze award.

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'Guess what? I won again.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'

"'Start a company, make money.' Your business plan may be missing a few steps in the middle."

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

Soccer coach of the year.

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'We're looking for an award-winning sales professional. Those are trophies. You're overqualified.'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

'My blog has been favourited over half a million times but still no book deal!'

Hollywood or bust!

"...and I'd like to thank all my patients for being so ill..."

"I got a job!"

Hospital Deaths - "Congratulations, you're manager of the month again"

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

"...and this one is for the Spritzer Beer account."

'Shouldn't you be somewhere clawing yourself to the top, or something?'

"We don�t do awards ceremonies up here actually"

'I'm stepping down. Who wants to become boss?'

As Seen On TV

"Here's my idea. . . we offer Trump the Nobel Peace Prize as a quid pro quo for leaving office."

'An internship is pretty much the only way to get your foot in the door these days...'

Norman E-Mailer

"I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

'Something that'll get me googled,'

Ladder of Success.

Many certificates of achievement on the wall.