Award Aspirants Pillows

'I'm off to Stockholm to receive the Nobel Prize for Peace.'

'Is there a Nobel Prize for viewing?'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

"With the caveat that the only certainty in this life is uncertainty, I still want to entertain the possibility of being a pundit when I grow up."

"I used to want to be an astronaut, but now I think I'd rather be a billionaire space tourist."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'In my opinion, hold out for a doctor.'

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

Comparing lottery odds with bus punctuality.

So close... Yet so far.

'My fortune says 'you can't be too thin, or too rich, or have too much computer memory'.'

"I'll bet Miss Parker gets teacher of the year for this."

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

'We're ready to move you to the top, Hopkins... but we don't know how much loneliness you can tolerate.'

'Frank said if he ever won a lot of money from online gambling, he wouldn't change, He lied,'

'Sir Percy is here for his Purple Heart, Sire.'

"That's the shoestring I started with. It was tied around 100 million dollars worth of stocks and bonds."

What I'd really like to do, of course, is direct.

'May I have my allowance in gold bullion?'

'How do you expect me to fine tune my act if you keep taking me to the principal's office?

"Never mind the carrot, where's my f*****g medal?"

'I don't want to be president when I grow up - but I'd like to have enough money to run.'

'Your mum and I are thinking about giving your power of attorney...' - 'Yes! Yes! Yes! I'm rich! Rich!' - '...and now, strangely, I'm having second thoughts.'

'Just because everyone applauded when you dropped your lunch tray in the cafeteria, doesn't mean that you should pursue a career in show business.'

"He quit his job to pursue his dreams."

'Yes, well we all like money'

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

Pygmy giant squid

"On the plus side, concussions are way down."

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'

'What shall I do with these old books of yours? '

'If you want to prepare for you retirement, why don't you buy a bank like I did?'

'Thank you. Do you mind if I spray it about like they do on tv?'

"With symptoms like yours, you could be the next Batman!"