Avian Advisors Pillows

"Be honest – is my pouch starting to sag?"

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

Caliologist

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Geez, what's with the delay?'

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

"Lovely robin ... though, I'm sensing a little attitude."

'I had a very unhappy egghood....'

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

'We decided to rent out the back room until the baby comes.'

'It's a symbiotic relationship. That lineman can crush quarterbacks with his bare hands...'

'It's always the same design. I wish he'd get a more imaginative set of house plans.'

'My husband and I are real bird lovers.'

Woodpecker House

"We must be in the wrong wing."

"What are the prevailing winds?"

"We've only got one parrot remember."

How to tell you might be getting too close with your pet.

"I'm not going to hammer it in. You hammer it in."

'If it happened at your birdhouse, your homeowner's insurance should cover it.'

'Are you a friend or a relative of the bird?'

Foolish Sid turns to look, and is immediately tackled and devoured by the duck.

"You don't want me. I've got bird flu!"

Bird box with amenities (plumbing, electricity).

'Honey, you're spoiling those birds!'

"Good heavens! She cooked Uncle Henry!"

'Still no takers, did it ever occur to you that they may not like the neighbourhood?'