Avant-garde Explorer Gifts

Sign on wall of spacious empty hall of museum: 'Air & Space Exhibit'

"That's what I call an off-off-off-off-off Broadway show!"

The Vineyard

"Congratulations, Amruk. You prove they do exist."

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

The Lost World: You are Here

Crab with a clown face.

Those Were The Days

A Footnote - Self Portrait of Beardsley, Bound to the God of Nature

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Kid doing cave paintings

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'No, really, go ahead. You know me - I'm all about the journey, not the food pellet!'

When at a loss for words Colin would often resort to communicating through the medium of contemporary dance.

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

Yoko Ono

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"Outré or simply bad?"

'How can they call it modern art when it's 100 year's old?'

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

The Abstract, The Modernist, The Avant-Guard.

'I saw an offbeat play the other night. No one took off their clothes.'

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"Are my breasts AI? No! My cartoonist would never use AI!"

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

Samuel Beckett

Mammoth Posing

Metropolitan Art Center current exhibit: Father of the Finger-In-Your-Eye School of Modern Art.

Maria Sibylla Merian

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

"Wow! I knew you were rich, but I didn't know you were that rich!"

"Please turn on your cell phones."