Autobiography Aficionados Gifts

I keep meaning to write my memoirs, but I never get around to it. It's your "oughta" biography!

The First autobiography: 'I'm afraid, sire, if you want a biography, you'll have to write it yourself!'

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

Sign in a bookshop window offers chance to meet the narrator of the audio book.

Tequila Mockingbird

I'm currently working on my autobiography. Would you care to help make page 327 interesting?

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

'It's Dick Cheney's biography.'

BOOKS ON VIDEO/BOOKS ON TAPE/READ YOUR OWN.

Thomas Keneally

"It's my autobiography. I call it, 'I Married Her For Her Money, And Other Gross Miscalculations'."

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

'Sounds like it'll flop.'

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

Woman at bookshop counter says: 'The Political Memoirs Wing is through there.'

"I think you left something of your resumé... writer of fiction!"

Autobiographies - Fiction and Non-fiction.

"We'll have to retract that article. On of our co-authors is the night watchman."

'We won't publish your book 'The Life of a mayfly: An Autobiography' because it's only a page long!'

"This isn't working out - I'm an earthworm and you're a....are you even listening to me?"

Tony Blair and Blairwash.

"Poetry? Philosophy? Just what kind of dinner conversation do you want?"

When I was in jail, I passed the time by writing my autobiography. I took certain liberties with some of the characters. For instance, you appear in the later chapters

"I was able to get you a 2-book deal."

"Walter Thruggins, My Life as a Pensions Adviser."

"I think I'd rather wait till Benedict Cumberbatch does the audiobook."

'Meet the Author!'

"So- how go the formative years?"

Superfoods are in aisle three.

'Oh please uncle Jim! Tell us another creepy story of the living!'

"He and Carruthers are both doing biographies of Tolstoy, and it's a race to the finish."