Auto Parts Salesperson T-Shirts

"You've had six accidents?"

Larry's used art

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

'It seats two comfortably.'

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

"So...do you have a job now?"

It's great for pulling the birds!

Mohammad's motors

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

'God's speed.'

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

'Those are all highway miles. The previous owner was a pharmaceutical sales rep.'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

"An enormous amount of advanced engineering has gone into our latest models. That's not to say, of course, that an enormous amount of advanced engineering hasn't always gone into all our models."

'Do you have any of those cars with 'My Child Is An Honor Student' bumper stickers on them?'

'It's too cheap, can I haggle you up?'

"Perfect."

"This electric car is environmentally friendly and will bring your family closer together."

"This baby gets such horrible miles per gallon, you actually save on gas because nobody can afford to drive it!"

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"It goes from the factory to us in $29,500."

'I need a lot of trunk space.'

'How about a nice saloon?'

"Don't mix this up...I want a car with a moonroof. He wants one with a sunroof."

"And this model features a nifty, manual back-up device."

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

Barry gradually realised that buying a small car had its disadvantages

"Now if it's a people-mover you're after..."

Parts of an automobile

'Some people say they're ego-compensation, but what do they know.'