Auto Manufacturer Employee Gifts

"Please forward all my tickets to the auto manufacturer who made this self-driving car."

Is this for wiping greasy hands?

"I hope you don't mind, but I stuck in a little prayer for General Motors."

Our Cars Are Made By 100% American-Made Robots.

Stimulus bust

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

Auto Mechanic Birthdays

"In my experience, cars with hyphens in their names are the best."

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"

"Let me guess...you got a job here because you needed new parts for your lowrider project?"

'For Pete's sake, Edward - You're a PINE BEETLE. It's a little late to go into the automotive trade now!...'

'If you lose your electrical charge before you get to a recharge, you just wind this.'

'More people will buy our cars if we become a carbon neutral company.'

"Don't worry, man. President Trump will take care of us. . ."

'The president's speech on how well the recovery is going? Well, make a left at the abandoned mall, a right at the shuttered assembly plant, and a left at the closed steel mill...'

"It means a chieftain tank of petrol."

'Of course, the car shower is optional.'

'I was fired from my last job for making too many bloomers. And I've just been fired from this one for not making enough!'

'That charge is for my accountant because this job is going to put me in a higher tax bracket.'

"It's our new electric car. We call it the 'Volts Wagon'."

Where's the difference?

"I had this weird nightmare. I dreamed I was a muffler! I woke up exhausted."

Crash test dummy unemployed begging.

General Motors.

'In the off-season I generally do some hunting and fishing, help out in my father's auto showroom, have knee surgery, and work out in my hometown youth center.'

'This may take more work than we thought.'

Union Label is Edsel

"The car's affordable. Going to a tech school to learn how to use all its technology will be a little costly."

"Do you sell backup cameras?"

"I've been out of work since the showroom closed down."

"Can you deliver that to me?"

New Big Three bailout cars?

Employee of the Month: Mr Wiggles.

"This car is very economical on gas. Used hardly any getting over here."

'C'mon... I just want to hug you!' - 'Arrrrrgh!'