Auto Aesthetician T-Shirts

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

'Botox...'

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

"Is that one of those cars that tells you when it needs maintenance?"

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

Tragedy and Remedy.

"But everything seems so neat and orderly we'd never guess that your lives are falling apart."

"Yep, she's gonna cost ya—your microprocessor's shot."

Headpiece to E Dowson's 'The Pierrot of the Minute'

"Do you have something cheap but with a really expensive label?"

"We may have to try search engine optimisation."

"Ugh. When will this acne go away?"

'You need orthopedic brake shoes.'