Auto Aesthetics Admirer T-Shirts

"They protect my car from dings so it always looks great."

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Driverless cars rage.

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

It's great for pulling the birds!

Route 666

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

Dave's Discount Auto Repair...only an arm or a leg, not both!

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

Smile

Man helping a mini learner driver

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

Nice park. . .

"An object of love that you can get inside, totally inside."

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

A man and woman use oars from within their car.

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

Tyre speaking to psychiatrist: 'I've been under a lot of pressure.'

'Nice smile.'

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

A man drives a car with the word "LAWYER" painted backwards on the front hood so that it can be read in the rear-view mirrors of other cars.

"This new car is so smart, it wrote its own AUTObiography."

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'