Australia Day Gifts

What a coincidence... they've invaded on Australia Day

Australian 'Then' and 'Nows', BBQ's

Queen's final visit to Australia: 'STrewth! Chack anatha prawn on the barbie Phil..'. Charles 'Apparently, the Aussies insisted on a few conditions..'

"May be next year he'll make you a Dame..."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Clown on bike.

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

Here and There Trays

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

Assault 'n' Vinegar

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

Fast food. Even faster food

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

National Everything Awareness Day

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

The best financial decision I ever made.

'What's wrong now?'

Organization is not rocket science!

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'Being offshored isn't exactly what I expected.'

Support group for sheep.

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

"War is hell and so is this soup."

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'