Attention Span Explorer Gifts

Pay Attention To Something For 5 Minutes Challenge

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"The overthinker"

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

"How come I can't remember what I forget, but I always remember that I forgot something!"

Book store has a book called 'Mind Games,' which is floating magically in the air.

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

"Let's get the important stuff out of the way while I'm still paying attention."

"It helps me stay focused."

"Are you one of these youngsters who has a very short attention span?"

"What are we watching? I don't know. Some show on short attention spans."

Brain Bomb Detector

Pavlov's Dog, Ph.D.

"How learning curves feel... Before: Holy hell During: I'm not gonna make it! After: That wasn't so bad! The next time: Again?!!"

"… and a big shout-out to my hippocampus, without which I wouldn’t be standing here saying words."

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

'Your problems are caused by all-or- nothing thinking. It's either that, or you don't have any problems.'

Media Whore Raceway.

"Those are my medals in mental gymnastics."

'Son, your teacher told me that you're having trouble focusing and other things that I zoned out on...'

Pavlov's dog (under a bell).

'I think you need to work on your frontal lobes.'

'We're all just pawns! Pawns dammit! Pawns in a stupid game!'

'Your attention span is not very long.'

"We've discovered the part of the human brain that activates achievement is located right next to the section that governs how much you look out the window."

One person's word balloon goes in one ear and out the other of the other person's ears.

"The truth is, humans aren’t smart enough to know how intelligent we are."