Attention Challenger Gifts

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"My email is down... talk to me."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Likes: $2.

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

The Mainstream

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

Ballet School - Ring For Attention.

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'I don't know where to begin in deciding what I want to be when I grow up...I want people to shut and leave me alone, and I need lots of attention, so...'

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

AI

'I've got it written down...'

"How on earth do you get this blasted box to open...?"

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

"It's not for you, it's for the paparazzi."

Mentioning 'Sex'

The universe that has me at the center of it is my kind of universe!

'Boy that Donna BUGS me! Every party she goes to, she ALWAYS has to make a grand entrance!'

"You can't just put on the uniform whenever you don't want to have a conversation, Barry."

"Let's go someplace else. There are no paparazzi here."

"At Hooters I'd already have three compliments on my tie!"

'I have your MRI results. Half your brain is clogged with passwords and the other half is clogged with user names.'

A man without a chicken on his head!

"Yes, we see you, Tom... but could you hold your comments until the end of the meeting?"

"Having captions above makes me feel like I'm doing grand opera."

"Thanks, I'll write that down."

Attention surplus

"Come on, Doc, one of us has to relax,"

Media Whore Raceway.

'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'