Assistants Gifts

' Is he expecting you?'

Lady to other: 'Not the screen, silly - you put the white-out on the CD!'

Office dictator.

'Powerbrowse this and get back to me with a sentence-long synopsis.'

'Er, that's not a rubbish container, that's a classroom, Minister.'

'Mary, I've got meetings all day so I'm going to be unable to have my scheduled happiness moment at 3:01. You have it for me, OK?'

'Have you got a mirror, Doctor - He wants to see what he looks like?'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

In basket-case.

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'Call for you on the cream corn line.'

"Morning, all!"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Good Luck!

Shake it all about sign on desk

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

Busy office.

'I bet you think I'm drinking tea...'

"At First Infidelity we're all about integrity...."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"Can you come back next week? He's napping."

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

"Ms. Ray, you're getting a promotion! You're no longer my Gal Friday. You're now my Gal Saturday."

"Do I have many meetings today?"

"...It's come to my attention you've been taking my calls."