Assertiveness Explorer Pillows

'Actually, what makes you think I suffer from insufficiency syndrome?'

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

"So...do you have a job now?"

"You need to stand up for yourself, or at least sit up straight."

Ego Increasing School

Free-Floating Anxiety

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

"Hell: The Airport"

Teen's Comet

'What else do you have going for you besides being aggressive?'

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

"So, Ms. Medusa. Let's talk about this fear of snakes you mentioned. Do you notice that it causes anxiety?"

"You call that worrying?"

"Honey, is the car filled up? My project here is finished and after my lunch I'm taking a new job in South America."

"My main worry is my anxiety."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"Then there was the dream where I woke up in a pool of melted butter."

"I feel we're almost down to bedrock, Mr. Bonwell."

"Well, I guess that old saying really is true: the squeaky wheel gets the grease!"

'You've got to be more assertive. You can't just say 'Cock-a-doodle-maybe-do.'

"My parents are nice, school's going well, and I'm basically a good kid. Unfortunately, there's no money or fame in being normal."

"But my real dream is gettin' paid lotsa money for doin' nothin'."

'Well, you're not a hypochondriac, you only THINK you're a hypochondriac!'

'When I call for the time and temperature, they say 'Who wants to know?''

"We've discovered the part of the human brain that activates achievement is located right next to the section that governs how much you look out the window."

'You have an irritable vowel syndrome.'

From the tournament of neuroses parade

"Well, I admire your assertiveness, but you might want to work on your people skills!"

If I'm a hypochondriac, what does that make YOU?

'Your glass is half full!'

What's that? - 'I've written a list of my anxieties.' - 'To help you tackle them 'head on'?' - 'Err... not exactly.' - 'To help put things in perspective?' - 'I just like writing lists, really.' -

"-But APART from 38" 22" 36" what else do you want to be, Cynthia?"

"Good ephening."