Aspiring Stars Gifts

'And for those of us still waiting for our big break, let us pray.'

'Doc, I just wanted to be a star.'

'They all want to play the star.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

Busking, "Stop worrying your father for money."

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

Mr. K's essay is such a drag! Yeah, but I've got to do really well. Twig! You're such a grind! Am not! Life isn't only about grades. I know! But he's directing the spring musical. And my singing won't get me the part all by itself! English: Gateway to the Grammys.

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

A push in the right direction: 50c.

Directors chairs on movie set with Model, Actress, and Whatever on them

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

So close... Yet so far.

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

Psychology Dept. Faculty Evaluations Today. I can't tell if it's my id or my ego, but I'm really craving a promotion.

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

I'm trying out for the spring play. You'll be great! Ha! You'll be grateful to be an usher, Meryl Creep. Yeah. The good parts go to real actors. Sigh. The arts are sooo uplifting.

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

"I'm not sure I'd want fifteen minutes of fame. Mum would only follow it with fifteen minutes of criticism."

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."