Aspiring Goalkeeper Gifts

'Boy, I love pretending to be Jens Lehmann...Now I can go home to watch football on TV!'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Saving a Heart

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

'Best save I've ever seen.'

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

Beer Order

The Goalkeeper

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

The best goalie in the world!

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

'What makes you think we'll lose today?'

Football

'Verily, we wuz robbed!'

A scarecrow goalie

"I'm not an intern, I'm a squire. I'm not an intern, I'm a squire..."

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois

Shy goalie smiles under umbrella in victory downfall of streamers

'Are you blind ref?'

Football Bomb

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

Goal!

Goal

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

'He's the best goalie we've ever had!'

'Hand in the area, penalty!'

Football Skills

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up... Can I have your autograph please?'