Artistic Armor Enthusiast Gifts

"I should say, he is a little sensitive to criticism!"

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Overjumpers

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

Black Belt/Yellow Belt/Green Belt/No Belt.

'Remember me?'

Knights of the bedside table.

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

'You may now kick the bride.'

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

Wonders of Evolution: This species has developed an unusual protective shell.

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

Mod Kwan Doh

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Before putting on your armor...always check for mice!

Old Karate Master

Repulse Monkey. Difficult position, but one day it may save your life. Get it right!

Gadzook used armour. Only one careful owner.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Somebody keeps snapping all the stud boards in half. Anybody know anything about this?'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

Knight walking a dog.

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

New and Used Armor. Ow! Ow! Ouch! Ow! I told you to spring for the under-coating option.

Cluck Norris in...LAYED in ACTION!

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

'Your Thai-chi-chicken Sir.'

"Use your words, Jefferson! Not a roundhouse to the face!"

'Elroy had an unfortunate knack for picking fights with the wrong people'