Armor Aficionado Gifts

As hordes of angry orcs advanced he began to wonder if dwarves were the best choice.

Knight washes with a rust remover.

'I was just thinking about the good old days... You know, before road salt!'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

Armour Being Screwed On.

Poetry Knight

"I told you idiots all that chest bumping would get you stuck to each other some day."

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

Rust around the col lar! Rust around the col lar!

Shall I goeth to the Prom. Hey nonny nonny...'

Knight and bird.

'Do you have to advertise the fact I'm new at the game?'

Knight in heavy armour

Gadzook used armour. Only one careful owner.

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

Knight Vision

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

'. . . while the weight of the armour . . .'

"He's always on message."

Wonders of Evolution: This species has developed an unusual protective shell.

"Relax dear. You haven't 'put on a ridiculous amount of weight'. You've just forgotten to take off your armour."

New and Used Armor. Ow! Ow! Ouch! Ow! I told you to spring for the under-coating option.

No, I don

"My mom still makes all my clothes by hand."

Weak Knights

Suit of armor. Sport coat of armor

"Of course his armor was shining. He was gay."

A knight wearing a full suit of armor with a doorknocker attached to his chest.

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

"My girlfriend really went all out on this one."

Knights of the bedside table.

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

Ale. Mead. It's been a hard knight's day!