Artisanal Distillery Aficionado T-Shirts

Zeke only drinks craft hootch from a micro-still nowadays.

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Join me in a Martini?

"I'm afraid our drinking water isn't pure."

Trump Poutine

Wanna talk about it?

'Not only was the superbug immune to antibiotics, but it had developed a taste for Dr Jones' whisky.'

I'd like a mocha almond vanilla latte...hold the coffee.

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

'Whiskey and splash, sir.'

Which Hogwarts house are you?

"We'd like to do a song that will barely penetrate your consciousness as you continue to enjoy those faddish cigars and single-malt scotches."

"Hey, who wants to hear a great single-malt story."

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

"Whiskey...Leave the bottle."

'The yeast cells are flocculating? - I don't think the kids are ready for that.'

The Babe calls his shot.

Whiskey Bottle - Well it doesn't look like a paperweight to me.

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

The Angel's Share

'Did you hear? We have a new slogan: Artisan-crafted wine made the old-world way.'

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."

"Is that neat whisky?"

'If you don't start feeling better in 24 hours, pour yourself a tall scotch.'

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

Scotch and soda on a drip.

Ethics Committee Meeting Today, BYOB.

"Scotch and water, *hic* scotch and water..."

"Yes, I'm the Cowardly Lion, and I want a double shot of single malt courage for the Yellow Brick Road."

"I'll have a Maker's Mark, and she'll have a shot at being the mother she never was."

"Who, Big Sal? Sure, we were in cahoots years ago, but we fell out of cahoots."

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

'Water is a valuable good and we should use it sparingly. That's why I'd like my Scotch straight.'

"This is Norman's little bureau of alcohol, tobacco, and firearms."